Aleister克劳利

在这里你会发现长诗幸福的灰尘诗人阿莱斯特·克劳利

幸福的灰尘

玛戈特雪从天上歧视,承担我在你的翅膀在空中的穹顶star-girdled七,不可言喻的东西的住所,精华的欢乐和力量,,废除未来和过去,Mak目前的眼中暗藏杀机无限长度,我的灵魂一个巨大的,孤独的,说不出名字的神,他的无限的冰的寒冷,没有或形式或住所,没有运动或物质,宇宙护送睡的褶皱,也没有意义,没有妄想也没有梦想,没有肆意妄为或哭泣的灵魂,没有沉默中至高无上的思想。我坐着,一动不动;在我的眼里是我那深不可测的欲望,那火焰要消灭意志,要把我的生命粉碎成尘土,要把尘土烧成灰烬,把灰烬烧成空气,要用最后的闪光,那猛烈的闪光来消灭空气。这一切我都做了,我的思想的原始胚芽被消灭了;我把自己卷起来,把我的生命之轮转到零。还有记忆吗?我过去是,现在是吗?它丢失了。当我说出圣言的时候,我被最后的冰霜之矛撕裂了。 Snow! I am nothing at last; I sit, and am utterly still; They are perished, the phantoms, and past; they were born of my weariness-will When I craved, craved being and form, when the con- sciousness-cloud was a mist Precurser of stupor and storm, when I and my shadow had kissed, And brought into life all the shapes that confused the clear space with their marks, Vain spectres whose vapour escapes, a whirlwind of ruinous sparks, No substance have any of these; I have dreamed them in sickness of lust, Delirium born of disease-ah, whence was the master, the "must" Imposed on the All? is it true, then, that something in me Is subject to fate? Are there two, after all, that can be? I have brought all that is to an end; for myself am suffic- ient and sole. Do I trick myself now? Shall I rend once again this homologous Whole? I have stripped every garment from space; I have strangled the secre of Time, All being is fled from my face, with Motion's inhibited rime. Stiller and stiller I sit, till even Infinity fades; 'Tis an idol-'tis weakness of wit that breeds, in inanity, shades! Yet the fullness of Naught I become, the deepest and steadiest Naught, Contains in its nature the sum of the functions of being and thought. Still as I sit, and destroy all possible trace of the past, All germ of the future, nor joy nor knowledge alive at the last, It is vain, for the Silence is dowered with a nature, the seed of a name: Necessity, fearfully flowered with the blossom of possible Aim. I am Necessity? Scry Necessity mother of Fate! And Fate determines me "I"; and I have the Will to create. Vast is the sphere, but it turns on itself like the pettiest star. And I am the looby that learns that all things equally are. Inscrutable Nothing, the Gods, the cosmos of Fire and of Mist. Suns,atoms, the clouds and the clouds ineluctably dare to exist- I have made the Voyage of Thought, the Voyage of Vision, I swam To the heart of the Ocean of Naught from the source of the Spring of I am: I know myself wholly the brother alike of the All and the One; I know that all things are each other, that their sum and their substance is None; But the knowledge itself can excel, its fulness hath broken its bond; All's Truth, and all's falsehood as well, and-what of the region beyond? So, still though I sit, as for ever, I stab to the heart of my spine; I destroy the last seed of endeavour to seal up my soul in the shrine Of Silence, Eternity, Peace; I abandon the Here and the Now; I cease from the effort to cease; I absolve the dead I from its Vow, I am wholly content to be dust, whether that be a mote or a star, To live and to love and to lust, acknowledge what seem for what are, Not to care what I am, if I be, whence I came, whither go, how I thrive, If my spirit be bound or be free, save as Nature contrive. What I am, that I am, 'tis enough. I am part of a glorious game. Am I cast for madness or love? I am cast to esteem them the same. Am I only a dream in the sleep of some butterfly? Phantom of fright Conceived, who knows how, or how deep, in the measure- less womb of the night? I imagine impossible thought, metaphysical voids that beget Ideas intagible wrought to things less conceivable yet. It may be. Little I reck -but, assume the existence of earth. Am I born to be hanged by the neck, a curse from the hour of my birth? Am I born to abolish man's guilt? His horrible heritage, awe? Or a seed in his wantoness spilt by a jester? I care not a straw, For I understand Do what thou wilt; and that is th