克里斯托弗·约翰·布伦南

在这里你会发现长诗后记:1908诗人克里斯托弗·约翰·布伦南

后记:1908

有轨电车轰鸣着向西驶去,电线在头顶上尖声歌唱,隆冬的寒风吹得玻璃格格作响,它显示了暮色中我走过的路,通向你那四座方形塔楼,那里仍然颂扬着那个黄金时刻,在那里,青春曾经开始,珍爱着一个随着岁月而丰富的宝藏。昏暗的楼上沿着扭曲破旧的街道蜿蜒而行;在下面,铺面被遮蔽的道路沐浴在灯笼灯的橘黄色火焰中,或者在电灯泡的可怕的蓝色中,怪异地凝视着幽灵。我看见他们沿着窗户走来走去,在夜幕降临的地方,缓慢而又匆匆地走着,城市的人行道上飘浮着,街上可怜的乐趣从他们吝啬的家里引诱他们,不为人知地相遇和混合,感受他们与黑夜之间明亮的平庸。所以,在我年轻的时候,我看到他们飞到他们虚幻的梦点燃的地方;所以现在我看到了他们,我能读出他们不自觉的需求的冲动——我和我一样,无论多么黑暗,都在向同一个母方舟寻求。但是,过了杜松子酒店那耀眼的灯光,突然出现了一片宁静的空气,一片漆黑,在那里,在人行道蜿蜒的道路之外,被一大片肃静的树叶掩盖着,平平的尖顶的圣坛在起伏,它的长筒窗隐约显示出一片红润的光辉,那是为伯利恒的马槽第一次温暖的上帝而保存的朦胧而丰盈的崇拜之灯,是人间最甜蜜的神,是圣餐中爱的囚徒,是人类恳求的、耐心的情爱者;在我被虔诚的人捧来捧去的地方,立着一盆圣餐盆,像个圣婴,这样我就可以被这群人所接纳了。他们在旅途中,在表面上的天堂之外,被控制得像一朵盛开的玫瑰,在金色的心闪闪发光的地方,一个马戏团接一个马戏团地上升,那里有受祝福的主人,他们的亲属,他们的安慰,他们的夸耀。我怀着爱和敬畏与他们一起走着,直到我意识到下面那阴森森的大肚子和散发着臭气的尸坑。什么是徒然咬牙切齿?那幸福的反面半球是这个吗? and could it be, when times fulfill'd had made the tally of either guild, that this mid-world, dredged clean in both, should no more bar their gruesome troth? So from beneath that choiring tent I stepp'd, and tho' my spirit's bent was dark to me as yet, I sought a sphere appeas'd and undistraught; and found viaticum and goal in that hard atom of the soul, that final grain of deathless mind, which Satan's watch-fiends shall not find nor the seven mills of darkness bruise, for all permission to abuse; stubborn, yet, if one seek aright, translucent all within and bright with sheen that bath no paradigm, not where our proud Golcondas brim, tho' sky and sea and leaf and flower, in each rare mood of virtual power, sleep in their gems' excepted day: and so, nor long, the guarded ray broke on my eagerness, who brought the lucid diamond-probe of thought and, driving it behind, the extreme blind vehemence of travailing dream against the inhibitory shell: and found, no grim eternal cell and presence of the shrouded Norn, but Eden, clad in nuptial mom, young, fair, and radiant with delight remorse nor sickness shall requite. Yes, Eden was my own, my bride; whatever malices denied, faithful and found again, nor long absent from aura of wooing song: but promis'd only, while the sun must travel yet thro' times undone; and life must guard the prize of youth, and thought must steward into truth the mines of magian ore divined in rich Cipangos of the mind: and I, that made my high attempt no bliss whence any were exempt, their fellow-pilgrim, I must greet these listless captives of the street, these fragments of an orphan'd drift whose dower was our mother's thrift, and, tho' they know it not, have care of what would be their loving prayer if skill bestow'd might,help them heed their craving for the simple meed to be together in the light when loneliness and dark incite: long is the way till we are met where Eden pays her hoarded debt and we are orb'd in her, and she hath still'd her hungering to be, with plentitude beyond impeach, single, distinct, and whole in each: and many an evening hour shall bring the dark crowd's dreary loitering to me who pass and see the tale of all my striving, bliss or bale, dated from either spire that strives clear of the shoal of shiftless lives, and promise, in all years' despite, fidelity to old delight.