我们是库塔蒙德拉两倍大的弹药库里的仓库管理员、店员和包装工，我们必须搬运的货物有水桶那么大的炸弹，有成吨的子弹，有看起来像幸运的煤气管道的炮弹，还有一排牵引枪。在处理存货时，我们树立了仓库的尊严。在这里签名，埃迪先生!克拉克森，快去找袜子!我们的地板搬运工是一个少校，嘴像桃子，还有一个口吃的特里比;还有一种跛行的讲话。我们八点钟出门办事，一点钟有空吃午饭，我们谈论着春季的新装，谈着生意兴隆。五点过后，我们找到了我们的掩体，掩体舒适地躺在山下，每个掩体前面都种着蜀葵，窗台上种着天竺葵。回家，甜蜜的家，?我们扫了一扫，擦了一擦，掸了一掸灰尘，然后在夜色柔和的优雅中，在门阶上抽起烟来。 After which with spade and rake we sought our special garden plot, And we 'tended to the cabbage and the shrink- ing young shallot. So long lived we unmolested that this seemed indeed ?the life.? Set apart from mirk and worry and the inci- dence of strife; And we trimmed our Kitchen Eden, swapping vegetable lore, Whi1e the whole demented world beside was muddled up with war. There was little talk of Boches and of bloody battle scenes, But a deal about Bill's spuds and Billy Carkeek's butter-beans; Porky specialised on onion and he had a sort of gift For a cabbage plump and tender that it took two men to lift. In the pleasant Sabbath morning, when the sun lit on our ?street,? And illumed the happy dugout with effulgence kind and sweet, It was fine to see us forking, raking, picking off the bugs, Treading flat the snails and woodlice and demolishing the slugs. Then one day old Fritz got going. He had a hint of us, And the shell the blighter posted was as roomy as a 'bus; He was groping round the dump, and kind of pecking after it; When he plugged the hill the world heeled up, the dome of heaven split. Then, 0 Gott and consternation! Swooped a shell a and stuck her nose In Carkeek's beans. Those beans came up! A cry of grief arose! As we watched them?plunk! another shell cut loose, and everywhere Flew the spuds of Billy Murphy. There were turnips in the air. Bill! she tore a quarter-acre from the land- scape. With it burst Tommy's carrots, and we watched them, and in whispers prayed and cursed. Then a wail of anguish 'scaped us. Boomed in Porky's cabbage plot A detestable concussion. Porky's cabbages were not! There the Breaking strain was reached, for Porky fetched an awful cry, And he rushed away and armed himself. With loathing in his eye, Up and over went the hero. He was savage Through and through, And he tore across the distance like a mad- dened kangaroo. They had left a woeful sight indeed?frail cab- bages all rent, Turnips mangled, little carrots all in one red burial blent, Parsnips ruined, lettuce shattered, torn and wilted beet and bean, And a black and grinning gap where once our garden flourished green. Five and fifty hours had passed when came a German in his shirt. On his back he carried Porky black with blood, and smoke and dirt. ?I sniped six of 'em,? said Porky, ?an' me pris'ner here,? he sez- ?I done in the crooel swine what strafed me helpless cabba-ges.?