The Spanish women don't wear slacks Because their hips are too enormous. 'Tis true each bulbous bosom lacks No inspiration that should warm us; But how our ardor seems to freeze When we behold their bulgy knees! Their starry eyes and dusky hair, Their dazzling teeth in smile so gracious, I love, but oh I wish they were Not so confoundedly curvacious. I'm sure I would prefer them willowy, Instead of obviously pillowy. It may be that they're plump because The caballeros like them that way; Since men are lean and Nature's laws Of contrast sway them to the fat way: For few their dames as much adore, as The señors love their sleek señoras. Well, each according to his taste. The dons prefer their women lardy, But me, I likes a tiny waist, And breast that fits a hand that's hardy: In short, my bottom money backs The baby who looks well in slacks.