洛伦佐·德·拉迪是一位贵族，他是女王陛下的侍卫之一。达利拉·德·达尔第很胖，达利拉·德·达尔第很老——(这是毫无疑问的)但是达利拉·德·达尔第有金子。洛伦佐·德·拉迪身材高大，是少女的宠儿，年轻的女士们会喜欢他的召唤，但洛伦佐·德·拉迪有债务。他的财产状况很奇怪，他最喜欢做的一件事就是每年躲三次，每次躲在巴黎好几个星期。没过多少天，他就把自己扇成一团火，为了一首美丽的“DAM DU COMPTWORE”，这就是她的独特名字:爱丽丝·尤拉莉·卡洛琳·euphroine·哥伦比亚比娜·特蕾斯·朱丽叶·斯蒂芬妮·塞莱斯汀·夏洛特·罗斯·德拉酱蛋黄酱。她在金碧辉煌的皇家宫殿里的一家餐馆里，穿着华丽的秋裤，预订了所有的订单和餐点。他凝视着她蓝色的眼眶，温柔地紧握着她的手，但他所知道的她的舌头只说了这些话:“卡洛琳·塞莱斯廷·尤拉莉，霍普勒!”Je vous aime, oui, mosso, Combien donnez moi aujourd'hui Bonjour，小姐，parlez voo。”酱汁蛋黄酱小姐是位机智美丽的小姐，举止得体，但她的英语总是这样:“噢，天哪!漂亮的小伙子，如果你愿意的话，布洛姆·布丹，比斯特克，咖喱羊肉，博尔多格，两个法郎半，相当的奶酪，罗斯比夫，我的钉子安利什，天哪。” A waiter, for seasons before, Had basked in her beautiful gaze, And burnt to dismember MILOR, HE LOVED DE LA SAUCE MAYONNAISE. He said to her, "Mechante THERESE, Avec desespoir tu m'accables. Penses-tu, DE LA SAUCE MAYONNAISE, Ses intentions sont honorables? "Flirtez toujours, ma belle, si tu oses - Je me vengerai ainsi, ma chere, JE LUI DIRAI DE QUOI L'ON COMPOSE VOL AU VENT E LA FINANCIERE!" LORD LARDY knew nothing of this - The waiter's devotion ignored, But he gazed on the beautiful miss, And never seemed weary or bored. The waiter would screw up his nerve, His fingers he'd snap and he'd dance - And LORD LARDY would smile and observe, "How strange are the customs of France!" Well, after delaying a space, His tradesmen no longer would wait: Returning to England apace, He yielded himself to his fate. LORD LARDY espoused, with a groan, MISS DARDY'S developing charms, And agreed to tag on to his own, Her name and her newly-found arms. The waiter he knelt at the toes Of an ugly and thin coryphee, Who danced in the hindermost rows At the Theatre des Varietes. MADEMOISELLE DE LA SAUCE MAYONNAISE Didn't yield to a gnawing despair But married a soldier, and plays As a pretty and pert Vivandiere.